THE DATING DELIMMA

The term dating has evolved over time. Unlike previous generations which understood the term dating to refer to something a guy and a girl did (ie. Going out on a date), the modern concept of dating often refers to something they are (ie. Boyfriend and girlfriend). We have created, apart from scripture, a fourth type of male-female relationship. In this, lies potential for great confusion, because when we create our category, we are forced to invent our own purity guidelines for that category. Many people think some level of sexual expression is permitted, but that sexual intercourse is out in dating. So they put dating somewhere between just friends and just married.

Note that the Bible is silent about sexual boundaries with in a dating relationship because God does not view a dating relationship as something distinct from the neighbour relationship. In as much as God has not prescribed explicitly the means by which we are to move from neighbour relationship to the marriage relationship (ie. Courting, dating, arranged marriages), he has clearly prescribed how he expects all men and women to act outside the marriage relationship.

So God’s standard of purity for a dating couple is the same as God’s standard for the neighbour relationship. Note that sex does not belong to us alone. Until we appreciate God’s authority over sex and purpose for sex, we will fail to make sense of it and struggle to steward it. We must not allow modern forms of courtship cloud God’s ideal for sex.

THE DELIMMA OF IT’S PERMANENT FOR NOW

In reality, a dating relationship is nothing more than a mirage, a relationship of smoke and mirrors that promises to be something more than it really is. Using a term such as commitment in the context of dating relationship stretches the normal usage of the word beyond the breaking point. When people talk of commitment in dating they mean they have agreed to date only each other. But this can end at any time for any reason (when one feels he or she cannot continue with the other, or that he or she feels they are not compatible etc).

unlike a dating relationship, the commitment and exclusivity of marriage is involuntary. It entails certain obligations and responsibilities that are irrevocable. When a man marries his bride, he gives up his right to choose any other woman. He is morally obliged to faithfully love his wife. But he did not have this obligation prior to marriage. In the end, the commitment of a dating relationship is simply a commitment to inform the other person of one’s intention to end his or her commitment before actually doing so.

Apart from marriage (or engagement) there can be no real promise, no assurance of mutual protection, and no real guarantee for abiding trust; neither party in a dating relationship has promised anything permanent.

The illusion of security usually puts the woman vulnerable. Because of the perception of security afforded by a dating relationship, a woman is inclined to give herself away sexually (even when this stops short of intercourse) in ways that she would not do with other men that she might be attracted to. Many women go through pain when a dating is terminated because of this false sense of safety. She goes through the pain of a divorce and she has never been married.

Many years ago, a man would court a woman to be his wife. But in our day, a man courts a woman to be his girlfriend. Girls, don’t give your heart away until you know what he plans to do with it. Men, stop being irresponsible. Don’t try to win a woman’s heart unless you plan on keeping it. Women; a man has nothing permanent to offer you apart from a marriage proposal. A declaration of attraction is not the basis for security. Dating relationships do not provide legitimate grounds for premature sexual expression, nor do they entail any measure of true security.

What makes sexual relations?

Sexual relations extend beyond sexual intercourse. Oral sex, fondling and mutual masturbation for example are all sexual activities. When we embrace the Biblical truth sexual relations must be reserved for marriage.

What about kissing?

Some forms of kissing are nonsexual. We kiss our children or our mothers. But some forms of kissing are reserved exclusively for our wives because they are sexual. If you think that passionate kissing is not sexual then consider this story:

Tom’s wife made a cake and told Tom not to eat it till the next day when they’ll celebrate their anniversary. Tom had his dinner and then went to the cake, cut a big slice and placed on his plate. He took bit after bit and chewed, then removed the crushed cake from his mouth and placed on the empty space on the cake. The wife came in and saw what Tom did. Then she asked Tom, “didn’t I tell you not to eat the cake today”? Tom replied “that’s just what I did. I didn’t have any eating relation with the cake because my definition of eating is to swallow. I only chewed and removed”.

What will you say from Tom’s response? Tom violated the instruction, tom knew what the wife meant when she said he should not eat the cake. He was not to touch the cake. Fondling, passionate kissing is sexual activity and should be reserved for marriage alone. Dating should remain in the neighbour relation; because no one is committed in dating. Any person can decide at any time that they cannot continue and it’ll end as friends; no heart is broken. Any sexual activity outside the Biblical bounds of sexual ethics is a sin. We can’t present ourselves “as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness (Rom 6:19). When Tom’s wife told him not to eat the cake, she meant “Leave it alone- don’t touch it” It is the same with the Bible’s teaching on sexual immorality.

We are not suggesting that passionate kissing is the same as sex, any more than Jesus, in his teaching on lust and adultery, meant to suggest that lust carries exactly the same consequences as adultery (Matt 5:27). Lust is of course a sexual sin.

SEX AND THE GOSPEL

Seeing earthly entities as pictures of divine realities is readily affirmed in much of scriptures. Rom 5:14 describes Adam as a type of Christ. A type represents something other than itself. So we are saying that Adam is a shadow, or an image of Christ. Exodus 11-12 also shows us that the Passover lamb is a type. Just as the children of Israel were delivered through the blood of a lamb, so too we are spared from God’s just judgement through the blood of Christ and are delivered out of the bondage of sin into the heavenly land of promise. Sex was also created by God to serve as a living witness to the gospel.

Eph 5:24-32 describes sexual relationship within marriage as an image of the spiritual relationship between Christ and the church. The treatment between husband and wife is paralleled to the relationship of Christ with the church. Marriage is more than sex, but it’s not less than sex. The book of Revelation refers to the wedding supper of the lamb as inaugurating the dawn of the eternal age (Rev 19:7;21:2,9;22:17; Matt 25:1-13).

The question is which came first? God did not pattern the divine marriage after human marriage, but rather human marriage is a foreshadowing of the divine marriage. It’s not as though God discovered the connection between sex and the gospel the way a Pastor reads through books and journals. No, the connection was purposed before the foundation of the world. As Paul tells us in 1Cor 6:16, the sexual oneness of marriage refers to Christ and the church.

The good news of salvation is not simply that God has forgiven us but rather, that through our union with Christ we are born again into his very life- we have become shares of his nature (2 Pet 1:4). Through our union with Christ, his life becomes our own. We are born again because we have been united to the one who is life itself. This needs transformation. While we are forgiven and the slate is wiped, we need to be transformed.

So God’s major intent in creating sex was that it serves as a living witness of the spiritual oneness between Christ and the Church. Viewing sexuality from this framework not only explains how we should act but also why we should act a certain way. You can now understand why Paul argues that we must not unite ourselves sexually to a prostitute, because we have become united spiritually to Christ (1Cor 6:15-17).

But our spiritual oneness with Christ does not prevent us from having sex with our spouse (1 Cor 7:5). Sex with a prostitute is forbidden because it breaks the picture of Christ’s single-minded connection and devotion to his bride. Just as Christ reserves himself spiritually for his spouse (the church), so too we are called to reserve ourselves sexually for our husband or wife. So our sexual behaviour most conform to what God has created sex to illustrate: the life-changing nature of the gospel. Monogamy and permanency are vital aspects of this image.

Christ has purposed to become one with the church alone. Accordingly, singles must reserve their sexuality for their future spouses as an expression of Christ’s single-minded devotion to his own. So, as we study sexual purity, we must remember that every part of us, including our sexuality, has a higher purpose than merely our own pleasure, for every part of us was created primarily to image forth the glory of God. Life has a higher purpose than our autonomous satisfaction.

PHYSICAL BOUNDARIES IN DATING (1Tim 5:1-2)

Many people think the Bible does not speak clearly on the issue of physical boundaries in dating. But God has set boundaries as you can see in 1Tim 5:1-2 to encourage or rebuke younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity. God has ordained three categories of Male-female relationships.

Family Sexual relations prohibited	Neighbour Sexual relations prohibited	Marriage Sexual relations Commanded
See Lev 18:6;26-28 God did not ban it until the giving of the law. That’s why we find the relation of Abraham and his half-sister (Gen 20:11-12), Lot and the daughters (Gen 19:31-36), Jacob who married two sisters (Gen 29:23-28) and presumably Cain, Abel and Seth, as well as Noah’s sons, all married blood relations	See 1 Cor 7:7-9 Those who have a strong desire for sexual intimacy (burn with passion) should fulfil that desire within the context of a marriage relationship. No sexual relation outside of marriage	See 1 Cor 7:3-5 It is not only permissible but commanded. Marriage couples are not to abstain from sexual relations

Genuine Worshipers put God’s plan first Haggai 1:1-11

There are many people here who have built a house for themselves. Building a house is a great project especially when your constraints are the number of people who will live in the house and what you’ll do with the space. If you want to get a building project going, just start it. When you want to make all the calculations, you may be discouraged; that’s why they call it estimate because it’s not exact. Especially when it’s God’s project; we need to depend on God not on our calculations, how we will get it and the timing because we do not have tomorrow.

After returning from the Babylonian captivity, Haggai was given a prophecy by God to rebuild the temple in Jerusalem.

   1.       Genuine worship eliminates all distractions (vs 1-2)

Haggai spoke to Zerubbabel and Joshua the son of Jozadak, the high Priest. God had already terminated the kings of Israel so Zerubbabel who’s called the son of Pedaiah in 1 Chr 3:19 through the Levirate marriage is also the legal son of Shealtiel. so he is a legal descendant from the Davidic linage.  But he was not considered as King. But God did use him to illustrate King Jesus who would come in the future of the remnant (Haggai 2:20-23). So Zerubbabel is used as a type of King Jesus who would come and rebuild the true temple of God which is in our hearts.

Why did the Jews delay in building the temple when they returned? The Lord says to them, “These people say: The time has not come for the house of the Lord to be rebuilt.”

Note the context:

-          The Samaritans had fought against the reestablishment of the Jews in the land.

-          Others assume that the Jews believed that the 70 years of exile had not actually been completed. So all these made them to think that it was a sign from God not to rebuild the temple.

They were distracted with the troubles with the Samaritans. Today your distraction may be the coronavirus pandemic that started here in Cameroon in march 2020. This has caused many companies and churches to postpone some of their activities and projects including us here. It may be other problems you have at home. You say you have not yet recovered from the crisis. Or you have other plans and you are wondering what to give for the house of worship. Listen to what delayed the Jews. They were focused on their own material stability before looking at God’s plan.

   2.     Genuine worship is focused on God and his plan (vs 3-6)

The people were seeking their own kingdom first, rather than the kingdom of God (Mt 6:25-34). They wanted to prosper themselves before they gave their material and labours to rebuild the temple. They were more concerned about the material things and their installation in the land before re-establishing the symbol that represented God among the returnees.

Are we different from them today? People complain about giving left and right; they say “I also have a project at home which is not yet completed”. I do have one too. Should it stop you from building the house of worship? Some are thinking of building their children, buy some clothes for their wives first, getting a car first, getting a bigger job first, some have other projects first. See what God says in verse 6 “You have planted much but harvested little. You eat but never have enough to be satisfied. You drink but never have enough to become drunk. You put on clothes but never have enough to get warm. The wage earner puts his wages into a bag with a hole in it.”

God is not prospering your labours in the land because you have neglected him. You are trying your best in your power but it is not satisfying; you are still in need and wanting. God says “Consider your ways”. Think carefully about your ways, and get into action.

   3.     Genuine worship is in action (yes worship in spirit and in truth) (vs 7-11)

Vs 8 says “Go up into the hills, bring down lumber, and build the house. Then I will be pleased with it and be glorified,” says the Lord.”

Go up and bring the wood, bring the sand, bring the cement and the concrete and build the house. God says, it will please Him and He will be glorified. Do you see why you should not miss giving for God’s building project? It brings glory to God. That is genuine worship in action with little talking but doing the talk. God sees the heart.

Your labours in the field are not bringing forth fruit because you neglected labouring for God in the temple work. There are people who are uncomfortable in the church or on the kind of benches we have because their homes are more comfortable and God says you should do something. Do something! Why should you be running to your own house while my house is in ruins? (vs 9)

God may be bringing drought to your life so that it stimulates a response. Did you see how people reacted when covid19 started killing? Many people started thinking about God, preachers intensified their messages. May be the trouble you have today is because God wants you to consider your ways and get into action.

God wants you to worship him with your material, not only your mouth. Yes, with your money. He says He will be glorified in that house of worship because it pleases Him. Brethren, consider your ways and if necessary change the money you had planned in your pocket for God’s glory.

Let me close with these words of Paul to the Corinthian church “Now the One who provides seed for the sower and bread for food will provide and multiply your seed and increase the harvest of your righteousness. You will be enriched in every way for all generosity, which produces thanksgiving to God through us. For the ministry of this service is not only supplying the needs of the saints, but is also overflowing in many acts of thanksgiving to God. They will glorify God for your obedience to the confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with others through the proof provided by this service.” (2 Cor 9:10-13).

Give in a way that will generate worship to God. Others glorify God for your act of generosity. And generosity is also an obedience to the confession of the gospel of Christ.

Shalom!

Genuine worshipers are true to themselves and recognise the kingship of Jesus Christ ( Luke 19 :28-40)

Many religious people today are worshiping according to their own inventions. But if we worship God according to the doctrines and commandments of men, we worship God in vain. Jesus said “And in vain they worship me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men” (Mk 7:7). We need to know God and His will if we must worship Him in Spirit and truth (John 4:23). You can understand why Paul addressed the Athenians in Acts 17:23 “The one whom you worship without knowing, Him I proclaim to you”. We’ll concentrate on the kingship of Jesus Christ as he entered Jerusalem in his last days on earth.

Jesus had just finished telling the people the parable of the gold coins where the one with the one coin after the return of the master was deprived of the single coin and given to the one who had ten coins because of his stewardship which also applies to the stewardship of our souls. After telling them this, He went on to Jerusalem and at the mount of Olives he sent the disciples to get a colt that has never been ridden.

   1.       Jesus is master and all knowing (vs 29-34)

He knew what the disciples will see ahead of them and what the owner will ask. Jesus gave them the response of the one who is Lord and master of the universe. I believe the man knew the master needed the donkey. He also knew the master otherwise he would have asked who is the master. The man didn’t resist the request because he knew who the master was. Do you know the master? Are you ready to hand it over to the master?

The man handed over the donkey. Today God wants you to hand over your heart to him in obedience. If you hand your heart to the master, you’ll worship him in spirit and in truth. Your worship will come from your heart not the mouth nor drums or atmosphere but at all times and everywhere worship will flow from your heart.

You’ll be able to worship God in giving even to the construction project of the church because the master needs it. It doesn’t matter the situation in which we are, worship will flow from those who know God.

He knows everything, your past, present and future. Why can’t you confide in Jesus? The disciples went to the village and found everything just as Jesus said. He is omniscient and you can’t hide from him, so give your life to him so that you can worship him everywhere; alone or in public without shame or fear, even in the presence of your enemies just like Gideon did in the camp of the enemies (Judges 7:15).

   2.       He was courageous to live the truth (35-37)

In his final week Jesus wanted all to know without doubt that he was Jesus the Christ, the son of the living God, the one who is worthy of our worship. So he took the great courage to enter Jerusalem like a king sitting on a donkey after the tension he had in the last years of his ministry with religious leaders. It takes courage to live out the truth in your life despite all opposition, shame, attacks, sickness, troubles or whatsoever even coronavirus. Live the truth, don’t just speak it but live it without fear. Jesus did even though he knew he will be killed for who he was. He was not afraid to enter Jerusalem in hiding but he entered on a donkey with a crowd shouting for Him.

   3.       Jesus boldly claimed to be the Messiah (vs 35)

In fulfilment of Zechariah 9:9, the king is coming riding on a donkey. He was coming as the prince of peace who rules the heart of men, not like a warrior. He was coming to save; that is the Messiah.

If Jesus was contented with just being a prophet or any other title, he would have lived to a good old age. But that was not his goal; but to be truthful, that’s why those who worship him must do so in spirit and in truth. But because He claimed to be the Christ, the saviour, the Messiah, He started his journey to the cross.

Throughout scriptures Jesus travelled everywhere he went by foot. He never rode on anything but just for the last two miles of his trip to Jerusalem he asks for a donkey which had never been ridden before. It was not because Jesus was tired but because he wanted to pass the message. In First Samuel 6:7 two cows that have never been yoked were to carry the ark of the Lord’s covenant, now Jesus is to ride on a colt that has never been ridden because he was bringing the new covenant that’ll be made in his blood because He is the Messiah. Can you see the parallel? He knew where He was going.

   4.       The crowd responded in praises (vs 38-40)

The disciples throw their cloaks over the donkey for Christ to sit on. People spread their cloaks and tree branches on the road as he rode on. Jesus was given the red carpet ushering as the king of Kings. Others took palm branches and went forth to meet Jesus as the apostle John says in John 12:13. They shouted “God bless the king who comes in the name of the Lord! Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!”

There were some people around who didn’t want Jesus to be worshiped. The Pharisees were there. They said “Teacher, command your disciples to be quiet”. Jesus replied “I tell you, if they were to keep silent, the stones would cry out!”. They were not to keep silent, but if they were to, something else will shout because he is the God who gives life and the spirit. Even stones will do it in worship to the creator.

Is anyone asking you to keep quiet before the king of kings? Is anyone asking you not to worship the Lord our God? Will you give true praise and worship to God or you’ll be like the Pharisees or like those who’ll turn and say crucify him?

Conclusion:

If you truly know who God is, you’ll worship him in spirit and in truth. You’ll not be influenced by music, by people around you not even by the problems around us. But if you have never had an encounter with Jesus, or you don’t know when you ever received Christ in your life, you are wasting your time here. You are just like the Pharisees or those who shouted Hosanna in the highest and turned back to say crucify him. You are worshiping in vain even though you’re here today. It’s time for you to give your life to Christ. Thank God that coronavirus has come to remind us of how the end times may look like. It will be worse than this, but after death, where will you be? Swimming in the lake of fire or with the king of kings? It’s time you bow your head and make things right with God.

To you who have believed:

·         God is Holy Spirit, so worship him in the holiness of your spirit (Is 1:15,16)

·         God is benevolent spirit, so worship him with a spirit of gratitude and thanksgiving (Ps 100:1,2)

·         God reigns over all things, worship him in reverence and awe (Is 6:1-5, Rev 1:12-18)

·         God is spirit of wisdom and intelligence, so worship him in totality of your mental ability (Mt 15:5,6)

·         God cannot be seen with eyes of men, so worship him in faith (Ex 20:4,5, 2Cor 5:7)

·         God is loving, worship him with a spirit of love for him and fellow worshipers (Mt 5:23-24)

·         God is a forgiving spirit, worship him with a forgiving spirit (Mt 6:14,15)

·         God is a fatherly spirit, worship like a child who trust and depend upon the Father of our spirit (Mt 6:9, Hb 12:19)

Knowing who God is and how you can worship God, I trust you’ll adjust your pockets to truly worship God with your giving for the church project starting from your heart.

Worship

Worship is praise and adoration, it is veneration and homage, emotion and intellect that instinctively flows from the inner soul of the created. Many religious people today are worshiping God according to their own inventions. But if we worship God according to the doctrines and commandments of men, we worship God in vain. Jesus said “And in vain they worship me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men” (Mk 7:7). God is our creator and he is the one to give us directives on how to worship him not us. We therefore need to know Him and His will to truly worship Him in Spirit and truth (John 4:23). See how Paul addressed this worshipers “The one whom you worship without knowing, Him I proclaim to you” (At 17:23)

We need to worship God daily because we need to present our bodies as living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is our reasonable service (Ro 12:1). We have to do these in these ways:

   1.       Worship by studying and proclaiming God’s word (At 5:42,8:4)

   2.       Worship by singing to praise God and admonishing one another (Eph 5:19, Cl3:16)

   3.       Worship by giving yourself to prayer and fasting (1Th 5:17, Ph 4:6)

   4.       Worship in giving and doing good in praise of God (2 cor 9:10-13, 1 Cor 6:20, gal 6:10)

   5.       Worship by communing with Jesus and one another (1 Cor 11:24,25)

·         Ignorance of who God is leads to worship of Him in ignorance

·         One cannot worship God acceptably without a knowledge of who God is.

Simply because someone worships, does not mean that their worship is acceptable to God. Man is created by God to be a worshiping being, man does not need to be taught how to worship. The Bible is therefore not a legal manual for worship but it teaches us on who to worship. The Bible speaks more of what one should not do in worship than giving a legal system of worship.

There are worships that are acceptable and those unacceptable to God. We must know the God of the Bible and believe the Bible in order to offer acceptable worship to God. Because of ignorance of the word of God men have worshiped the sun, moon, stars, angels or things of their imagination. But the angel told John “Worship God” (Rev 19:10; 22:8,9). John was not told to worship but who to worship. Jesus reminded Satan “You will worship the Lord your God and Him only will you serve” Mt 4:10). In the O.T people worshiped gods of Baal, Molech and others created out of their own imagination and they were not acceptable to God. Today people worship positions, wealth and profiles as well as others worship men of God. They are unacceptable before God. We can deliver ourselves from worship confusion only by studying the Bible.

What is True Worship (Acceptable worship)?

When one’s heart bows to God in worship, his knees will follow. In the O.T the word is Shalah. So  there’s an in word bowing down of the heart. (see Gen 22:5, 24:26, 24:48, 24:52, Ex 4:31, 34:8, Joshua 5:14, Job 1:20, Ps 95:6). If you have not yet bowed down in your heart, you cannot physically bow down like these men of the O.T. In the New testament the Greek word used is proskuneo which means “to kiss-toward” (Mt 2:11, 4:10 Heb 1:6)

In N.T we also have sebomai which means reverence or feeling of awesomeness (At 16:14, 18:7). It is also giving service to the Lord “Latreuo” which means “give homage” ie. Offering gifts or service in worship of God (At 24:14, Ph 3:3, Hb 10:2).  So, singing and praying are not worship, but only the outward expressions of an inward appreciation and adoration of God. So one can worship without any outward expressions or actions.

   a)      True worship is in Spirit (Jn 4:23,24)

God who is spirit is worshiped by that which is spirit. (At 17:24,25) Mechanical things or material things cannot be used to worship God who seeks to be worshiped in Spirit. Such things may be used by man to produce an atmosphere wherein man seeks to worship. But our worship is from the heart. How can the one who give life to all be worshiped by that which has no life?

God is one and our worship must be directed only to Him. The melody is made in your heart not material (Eph 5:19). God is listening to the hearts of those who are using the instruments of their voices to speak praises to Him. Worship in spirit involves both attitudes and motives in the heart of the worshiper. True worshipers do not need earthly crutches to stimulate worship. True worship is spontaneous, from the naked heart of man poured out towards God regardless of the environment, the sound that comes to his ears, or images in front of his eyes or aroma that he smells.

-          God is Holy Spirit, so one must worship Him in the holiness of one’s spirit (Is 1:15,18)

-          God is benevolent spirit, so one must worship him with a spirit of gratitude and thanksgiving (Ps 100:1,2, Ts 1:17, 2 Cor 4:15)

-          God reigns over all things, so one must worship him in reverence and awe (Is 6:1-5, rev 1:12-18)

-          God is spirit of wisdom and intelligence, so one must worship him in totality of one’s mental abilities (mt 15:5,6,22:37)

-          God cannot be seen with eyes of men, so he must be worshiped in faith (Ex 20:4,5, 2 Cor 5:7)

-          God is loving, so he must be worshiped with a spirit of love for Him and fellow worshipers (mt 5:23-24 1 Jn 4:8,11,20,21)

-          God is a forgiving spirit, so one must worship him with a forgiving spirit (Mt 6:14,15)

-          God is a Fatherly spirit, so we must worship him like a child who trust in and depend upon the Father of our spirits (Mt 6:9, Hb 12:9)

   b)      True worship is in Truth

He who is truth is worshiped only by those who walk in His truth. Worship cannot be legalised lest worshipers assume that they have worshiped after their performance of legal actions. When one seeks to be true in heart to God, then he will worship God in truth. True to god means that one’s life is given to God as His servant. We are servants to god, not in word, but indeed and truth (1Jn 3:17)

When one recognizes the grace of God, it is natural to respond with service. There’s a difference between worship and service, though some services are worship of God. Eg when you clean your house, it’s a duty because you don’t want a dirty house. It is not to worship God. However, if I clean your house it can be in worship to God (2 Cor 4:15) “Indeed, everything is for your benefit, so that grace, extended through more and more people, may cause thanksgiving to increase to God’s glory.” So in thanksgiving to God, we worship through our service to others.

Because of the overwhelming grace of God in my life, I may be moved to clean your house in service to your needs. So we talk of “worship service”. I have worshiped God in serving you. See how Paul puts it in Col 3:17. When men fee inspired and thankful to god, they worship.

Is there any particular place or condition for true worship?

In Acts 17:22-23 the Athenians crafted many idols with their hands but they were wise to know that if a god they made after their own thinking behave as their thinking then that god cannot be greater than their thinking. They concluded that there must be a God beyond the imagination of men. So they made an idol to “The unkown God” just in case they offended Him if they did not offer Him worship.

That is the true and living God of which they were ignorant and so they worshiped him in ignorance because they had worshiped him in ignorance because they had no revelation from Him. Through the revelation of the Bible, the same God is revealed today. People worship God out of the awesomeness of His presence in their lives. When the word of God is taught, the audience do not worship God though the preacher may be worshiping in service of God. But the audience is inspired by the word to worship in obedience to the word.

There’s no particular place for worship, no particular condition for worship from a true believer. You don’t need any song or music or a starter before you can worship God. It comes from the heart of one who truly knows God. When Gideon was in the camp of the Midianites after the Lord had promised deliverance for Israel; a midianite had a dream and another midianite was interpreting the dream while Gideon listen secretly outside the tent. The dream was that God would deliver the Midianites into the hands of the Israelites. “And so it was that Gideon worshiped when he heard the telling of the dream and its interpretation” (Judges 7:15)

So in the camp of the enemy, in the middle of the night, quietly with his fellow companion, Gideon worshiped. It was immediate, individual, quiet, and in a hostile environment. There were no drummers, no assembly, no audience, and certainly no noise.

·         The magi worshiped Jesus in a manger instantly when they saw Him (Mt 2:11)

·         Joshua worshiped when he saw the commander of the Lord’s army (Joshua 5:14)

·         Israel worshiped in their encounter with God (Ex 4:31)

·         Abraham’s servant worshiped in solitude (Gen 24:26)

·         Abraham worshiped with his son (Gen 22:5)

·         A leper worshiped Jesus though in the presence of many he focused on Jesus (Mt 8:1,2)

·         A ruler worshiped Jesus while he was teaching among multitudes of people (Mt 9:18). The multitudes were just listening to Jesus teaching no worship.

·         The disciples worshiped Jesus after seeing Him walking on water and calming the storm (Mt 14:33). He was the creator of all things.

Most of the time we quote Mt 18:20 out of context “For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there among them.” This is not a statement about worship; but of judgement actions taken in reference to the one who refuses to hear the church concerning his sin (Mt 18:17). If this passage is talking about assembly and worship, then the poor brother who is alone in the desert or jungle does not have a promise that the Lord is with him in his worship.

Our presence with two or three does not validate our worship. Neither does being alone restricts God’s presence with us as we worship in the solitude. Our assemblies do not mandate the presence of God. God is there before we get there. David concluded “where will I go from your spirit? Or where will I flee from your presence?” (Ps 139:7). Your worship must not be dependent on anything outside your heart. Though one may be inspired to worship because of his surroundings, it doesn’t mean we must have special surroundings to worship.

Honouring my Pastor: What does God expect of me? 1Tim 5:17-18; Heb 13:17

Introduction:

Regardless of how much you think your pastor likes you or not, you can and should appreciate your pastor. God calls us to honour those who are in authority over us. It is easy to criticize pastors on how much they do on their sermon with words like this:

“The sermon today was jerky”

“I didn’t really connect with the sermon”

“I think the pastor could have done a better job preparing his sermon”

“I didn’t make any sense from the sermon”

We often forget that the pastor has a life, family and other responsibilities throughout the week. We forget that the pastor is pastoring the whole congregation and the needs of everyone is different. I remember the day I insisted that we separate the children from our main service here in Mount Zion Baptist church Boko. My feedback was brought in by my daughter Faith when she went home and was struggling to preach my message at home. The poor girl at age 3 or so was struggle to hammer at home and I could not get all the words from her mouth. That’s when I knew that I cannot preach to children and adults at the same time. I could only hear “believe in the Lord Jesus” from her mouth. That’s what made me know that she was struggling to replay my sermon that Sunday. But she could not get all my words with the speed and the mature words that was not destined for children who are still learning. So, note that the Pastor has every worshipper in mind when presenting his message.

If we didn’t like the sermon, we don’t trust that the Holy Spirit is working in and through the pastor, their message, and the church and that someone in the church needed to hear that exact message. If we are not careful, we can fall victim to the spirit of entitlement where it becomes all about us. Remember that even if one person’s life is changed by the pastor’s message, then isn’t that what it’s all about?

Where did honouring pastors start?

Throughout church history, leaders were to be honoured. Pastors are to be considered worthy of double honour for assuming this role in Christ’s church and to do it well. But, typically with double honour, you can expect double stress, this is why we need to make an even greater effort to celebrate and encourage those in leadership.

 “Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honour, especially those who labour in preaching and teaching.”  1 Timothy 5:17

Is honouring Pastors Important?

Of course!

Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.  Hebrews 13:17

Your leaders are entrusted to watch over the entire congregation, small group, family group, etc. This can be a very overwhelming task and one that can lead to a lot of stress, late nights, and coffee. Leaders have a tendency to serve whether it is within their ministry or outside of the church walls, they simply love to serve and meet the needs of others. Whether it be time, money, meals, encouragement, leaders love to lend a hand. It is important to notice everything that your Pastor does for the congregation but what most people don’t realize is that they are not given back to very often. They easily slip through the cracks and we assume that they are doing fine and they are getting their needs met. If everyone had this mentality, then no one would be giving back to their Pastor. That is why this time in our calendar is most important. We should all appreciate or learn to appreciate our Pastors or Leaders and encourage them as much as they encourage each of us. At the end of the day, your Pastor is still a part of the body of Christ just like us and they should be treated in the same way we treat our other brothers and sisters.

How do I honour my Pastor?

  1.     By Supporting him

The elders who are good leaders should be considered worthy of an ample honorarium, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says: Do not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain, and, the worker is worthy of his wages (1 Timothy 5:17-18). Quoted from Deut 24:4-15

God’s people should pay their pastors generously, although no specific amount is given. Of course it’s not God’s plan for pastors to swindle/cheat their sheep or for churches to neglect their pastors. Paul even puts it clearer in 1 Corinthians 9:13-14 that those who proclaim the gospel should get their living by the gospel. You don’t need to be a theologian or Bible scholar to understand that, it is clear.

All pastors are to be honoured, but two kinds of pastors are worthy of “double honour” (v.17):

1.       “The elders who are good leaders.”

2.       “Those who work hard at preaching and teaching.”

The pastor’s job is to take care of his church, and it’s the church’s job to take care of their pastors.

Those who proclaim the gospel should make their living by the gospel (1 Corinthians 9:14).

The one who is taught the message must share all his good things with the teacher (Galatians 6:6). God is not mocked; you reap what you sow; so do not be deceived.

i.                   Bring Your Pastor Food and share with his family. This can bring hours of closeness and rest to your pastor and family.

ii.                   Celebrate Big with your pastor. Let him know how much you appreciate him for the work he does

iii.                 Make meaningful conversation with him. Not just talking about the negative things in other people’s lives. Ask the pastor about his problems and how you can be of help and how you can be praying specifically for him. That is what the pastor needs.

iv.                 Show up in events, classes, services, etc. it is encouraging for your pastor to see that you are present in the programs and that you are also encouraging others.

v.                   Be an active listener in services. The pastor’s responsibility is to teach and he wants to be sure that you are listening actively. A pastor can tell if you were attentive in the service or not. Encourage your pastor by being an active listener

vi.                 Show kindness to your pastor’s family. He is human and would also love to see that you care for his family even as he cares for your spiritual growth.

vii.               Support your pastor financially (1 Thessalonians 5:12-13; 1 Timothy 5:17; 1 Corinthians 9:14). Hopefully, you will not do this out of a grudging heart or because you know the church is keeping track of who’s giving and who’s not. Whether or not your pastor knows you’re giving, you ought to do so. Small cash gifts, given personally, may also be an encouragement to the pastor.

viii.             Don’t give gifts to your pastor with secret agendas. eg. Giving your pastor a book on leadership because you think he is failing in some leadership skills. That may cause the pastor not to appreciate your gift except he expressed the need. That’s why you must be honest to talk with your pastor.

ix.                 Don’t give a New Bible to your pastor. It sound’s strange right?  If your pastor has not expressed the need for a particular Bible translation, do not give him. It may not be of use to him even though he will take it. Most pastors have libraries of Bibles, so your new Bible may not bring value to your Pastor.   

  2.     By defending him

 A non-negotiable qualification for an elder is that he must have a good reputation with outsiders (1 Timothy 3:7). Apparently, several church leaders attacked the apostle Paul’s reputation, and see what he writes:

Alexander the coppersmith did me great harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds. Beware of him yourself, for he strongly opposed our message. At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them! But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. So I was rescued from the lion's mouth. (2 Timothy 4:14–17).

It’s the church member’s job to not only provide for his or her pastors, but to also protect them from the Alexanders in the church and community. Joseph, Moses, David, Jeremiah, and Nehemiah were also criticized publicly. It’s not enough to defend our pastors privately. It’s each of our job to make sure our pastors aren’t treated like a floor-mat or punching bag.

i.                     Be loyal to your pastor. The best encouragement that a pastor can receive is the gift of his people’s loyalty. If your pastor is a person of integrity, who loves Jesus, who is committed to God’s Word, and who faithfully shepherds their flock in a biblical way, stick with them. You may recognize his humanness and identify his weaknesses, but you can stick with him. Pastors need people to go through the tough times. They need you. Encourage your pastor by being loyal to them.

ii.                   When in doubt about anything ask. A lot of problems usually come from rumours and misconceptions.

iii.                  Make sure you have a good connection. Do not jump from church to church when you are frustrated. Your church is your family, stay committed and you can truly defend even your pastor.

  3.     By recognizing them

 Now we ask you, brothers, to give recognition to those who labour among you and lead you in the Lord and admonish you (1 Thessalonians 5:12).

If pastors do the best they can, the church will do the best they can to take care of them. Honestly, that has been the case most of the time, but not all of the time. Sometimes the pastors didn’t do the best they could, while the church did. Other times, the pastors did the best they could and the church didn’t step up. Why is that? Because we’re a family—and families make mistakes.

It seems to take less effort to point out someone’s weaknesses than their strengths. Are you ready to recognise your pastor today in public?

i.                     Thank your pastor regularly. The way you appreciate your pastor matters. Just telling him “Thank you for the work you are doing” is good but not so meaningful. If you tell him, “Thank you for the verse 17 you explained today in the sermon. I will share this with my children at home today. I didn’t understand it that way but now I see. You really did a lot of studies on this”. That gives more meaning than the generic thank you. “I was blessed”.

ii.                   Never give history lessons for your pastor.  Don’t compare him with the former pastor or former golden years. That is a way to recognise your pastor.

iii.                 Remember there is only one senior pastor. He is the one in charge and may be busy in some situations. So be your pastor’s eyes and ears. Don’t let things pass on which he didn’t know about it.

  4.     By loving them

Their job is to “keep watch over you” (Hebrews 13:17), but sometimes they need you to watch over them as well. Whether they’re leading successfully or failing miserably, in season and out of season, they all need the respect and love of their church families.

Regard them very highly in love because of their work (1 Thessalonians 5:13).

Make sure your pastor knows that he’s a beloved member of your church family, and not just an employee who will eventually go somewhere else.

It is right for me to think this way about all of you, because I have you in my heart, and you are all partners with me in grace, both in my imprisonment and in the defense and establishment of the gospel.  For God is my witness, how deeply I miss all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:7–8).

i.                     Another way of showing love to your pastor is by growing in grace. Nearly two-thousand years ago, the apostle John wrote the heart-cry of nearly every pastor across the ages: “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth” (3 John 1:4). If you really want to show appreciation — to give your pastor his greatest joy — walk in truth. Don’t do this just for your pastor. Do this because you’re a Christian and because Christians grow (1 Thessalonians 4:3).

ii.                   Always be honest to your pastor and if you have a problem, go and talk to him; don’t complain to others. He may not welcome your idea but don’t be discouraged, you have done what is right and your pastor is also human.

Conclusion:

1. HONOR YOUR PASTOR BY SUPPORTING HIM

2. HONOR YOUR PASTOR BY DEFENDING HIM

3. HONOR YOUR PASTOR BY RECOGNIZING HIM

4. HONOR YOUR PASTOR BY LOVING HIM